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Dr. ROBOTNIK ⬤ SONIC THE HEDGEHOG (2020)

residential district ⬤ LEVEL 2

MOONBLESSING ⬤ IRIS

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( TEXT. ) MAY 20th — un: SUGARSAMURAI69

[naturallywavy]

_{[ It's been about a week since they had their conversation, so it's time for a follow up.
Also, Gintoki has a lot of fun irritating this man and he's bored right now, so. Texting it is. ]}

yo robo-sensei
did you **** yourself yet?

un: robotman

[evilgrows]

[It is, thankfully, no longer any variety of Iris time, but while he'd like to put certain things behind him... well. Apparently, he can't, and he groans in annoyance when he sees the text.]

Can't just let that whole thing go, can you.

[HE REGRETS THAT POST SO MUCH]

[naturallywavy]

my sworn duty as a good guy is to check in on people who had an outcry for help

_{[ He knows it wasn't an "outcry" but it seems fun to ruffle the other man a bit. ]}

even if they're a bad guy
also just wanna know when these things are gonna be on the market

[evilgrows]

I'm not actually a bad guy.

[All the evil stuff is just ironic or something, that's all.]

You think I could get anything DONE in the past week??? I'm still acclimating to the technology here. Taking some time to make sure I can put things together right.

[He quickly fires off another text.]

Not for the sexbots. For bots in general.

[While he focuses on his device, he tries not to make "eye contact" with the thing he'd started building after the previous conversation.]

[naturallywavy]

most bad guys are extremely narcissistic and have a general dislike for mankind, but maybe i'm counting my chickens too early before they hatch
hatch from your eggman bots

_{[ A break in his text as well. ]}

it's alright to admit you tried making a sex toy
this is sex land after all

[evilgrows]

I told you, using animals is inefficient.

Thing is, I wasn't in my right mind when I built the damn thing, and now that I'm in my right mind, I'm even more annoyed.

...It looks like a fucking mess.

[naturallywavy]

does it look like an antique microwave at least?
look, man, i'm sure it's great progress.. you don't gotta be hard on yourself

not everyone can just whip any kind of bot out of thin air on an alien planet

[evilgrows]

No, if you must know, it's essentially a dildo on a stick. I don't know what the hell I was thinking.

I'm not EVERYONE though. This is what I'm GOOD at.

[Wait, wait, he's basically admitting to having issues, that WILL NOT DO.]

But now that I can think clearly again I think I'll work on something more worthwhile.

[naturallywavy]

a dildo on a stick
that's pure genius

_{[ Oof. Yeah. Those are some issues just out in the open there. ]}

i don't know
a dildo on a stick is pretty worthwhile in my opinion

[evilgrows]

There were moving parts[, he makes sure to clarify, because THAT'S IMPORTANT.]

Right, whatever. It's less than useless to me right now, either way. Maybe I'll be more inspired the next time I'm forced to care about that kind of thing.

[naturallywavy]

which will be in a few weeks
better jump on it so you're prepared

by the way is your moon blessing just being really sweaty? i get fur and tails and they're kind of annoying but what can you do

[evilgrows]

[It's just going to keep going and going, isn't it.]

Fine. I guess it still works as a first project.

But no, it wasn't just being sweaty, and I believe that was brought on by other things. Oddly enough I found myself with traits analogous to jellyfish for some reason. Including arms. Somewhere.

Except fangs. I had fangs. Do local jellyfish have fangs?

[naturallywavy]

oh man.. you got tentacles.. not gonna lie i'm a little jealous of that.. you kept them well hidden on camera

not that i know of.. sometimes people get traits from several different animals

[evilgrows]

Don't be. They're not particularly useful and you didn't see them because I was wearing pants.

[THERE. HE SAID IT.]

Hm. Interesting choice, though. I really question the logic of most of the changes.

[naturallywavy]

_{[ a tENTACLE DICK.. now he's really jealous. ]}

oi you're not allowed to have a tentacle dick
that's too cool!! don't be so greedy with your tentadick!!

i don't think there's logic i just think some people are lucky and some aren't
does your asshole get all leaky too? cause if that's the case maybe you aren't cool

[evilgrows]

You think I wanted it??? It was just as much of a pain as everything else. More, even. Everything moved around too much.

[HE'D TRADE IF HE COULD.

BUT ALSO UGH WHO WANTS TO BE REMINDED OF BUTT LEAKING.]

That might be basically what I was sweating about. Unpleasant biological impossibilities.

[naturallywavy]

_{[ But do we really want a Kitsune-nik? Something that can hypnotize and use mind tricks? Is Prismatica ready for that? ]}

it's convenient
you know
if you were actually screwing people

_{[ He almost feels sorry for him. That does sound like the rough life for someone who just trying to overcome it on his own. ]}

i know it's not what butt plugs are actually for
but
i mean
they are *technically* plugs if things get too messy

[evilgrows]

Inconvenient if you prefer not to.

[He was mostly just willing to trade the dick but he probably wouldn't say no to Way Better Powers... But, alas, his body wants what his body wants.

As for the buttplug... ugh.]

Ha. Hilarious.

Wait.

Wouldn't the stimulation just make it worse?? It's clearly meant for lubrication, and that'd just trigger it to produce more. It's going to be messy either way.

[He can't believe he's talking about this. The moon is gone, and he's talking about this.]

[naturallywavy]

looks like you have another project to work on for your backdoor problem i guess

_{[ It's okay. Gintoki has the tendency to be a filthy talker so it just kind of happens whether you wanted it or not. ]}

[evilgrows]

[w h y]

More like it's amazing how eager you are to hear about me sticking things up my ass.

[naturallywavy]

_{[ If this were a video call, he's give him a deadpan salute. ]}
i'm always interested in people sticking things up their asses

but also, it sounds like you have a lot of hang ups you need to get over so you're not incredibly miserable in this place
i'm just here for moral support

_{[ how is anything he saying moral support..
But it's true. Gintoki's thing back home was helping people with problems no matter what they were. ]}

[evilgrows]

Do I want to know why?

But I'm pretty sure I'd be miserable in this place even if I decided to just go wild. Even now that everything's fine, I know it's all going to happen over again and I'll lose my mind, so I have that to dread, and make things that remind me of dreading it.

[BUT it's also incredibly bizarre (and suspicious) that anyone wants to moral support him for anything. IT'S WEIRD. IT'S TOO WEIRD.]

[naturallywavy]

_{[ It's what he DOES, just accept it. ]}

does nothing at all make you happy?

_{[ Oop. He's psychoanalyzing again. ]}

[evilgrows]

The hell kind of question is that?

[Why, why, why.]

Of course there's things that make me happy. Finishing a project, designing the perfect playlist, a good latte. I'm just not at liberty to enjoy anything anymore.

[He's so dramatic.]

[naturallywavy]

_{[ So dramatic. ]}

just sounds like you're not even trying to be positive here
yeah, there's stuff i don't like about being here and i'd rather be home, but..
parfaits and sweets make me happy and this place had good desserts
you get used to being here

on that note, their lattes are pretty decent

_{[ Gintoki misses his city and all the people he swore to protect. Since he's an orphan and found a family there, he especially misses them, but he's trying to find silver linings here despite the fact he's usually pretty apathetic. ]}