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Dr. ROBOTNIK ⬤ SONIC THE HEDGEHOG (2020)

residential district ⬤ LEVEL 2

MOONBLESSING ⬤ IRIS

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[evilgrows]

Which you chose to do, by your own volition.

[How does one man, who doesn't want, need, or care about friends, end up with people who actually want to be? It makes no sense.]

What makes me so goddamn interesting? Why do you care so much?

[herocomplex]

Well. For one thing, you look like Jim Carrey.
Secondly, you work for the American government, which I guess.. I kind of do too in a weird way. We both like science! And conspiracy theories! And taiyaki.

Also your tentacles are pretty neat. I wouldn't mind seeing them again at some point.

_{[ America. ]}

[evilgrows]

[He lets out a heavy, heavy sigh.]

I don't really see the resemblance.

[And the other stuff he can just let go for the moment, because:]

...You work for the government?

[Is this some kind of immortality project not even he got clearance to know about???]

[herocomplex]

Kind of? I mean, I sort of don't know my whole purpose...
_{[ that's a mood... ]}

But I'm involved in a lot of different stuff. All of the wars, politics and economics, science...

We talked about this before, but maybe I didn't make myself clear.

I'm the embodiment of the United States. So I've worked alongside all of the Presidents and other historical figures. They're considered my "boss."

[evilgrows]

...When'd we get a mascot?

[Because that's definitely the first thing he thinks of where "embodiment" is concerned. Other possibilities are just ridiculous.

...Are they? In magic nicey nice land?]

I've heard of being fucked over by your country but this is just absurd.

[herocomplex]

A mascot? I'm cooler than that! 'Cause.. uh..

_{[ Uh. Well. ]}

I mean, there's a difference! I'm not a mascot!

[evilgrows]

You make it sound like you're a mascot.

[Because, you know, seriously, that's the exact vibe he got from the whole thing. Mascot.]

They need to do a better job with marketing.