[Oh, thank fuck. That at least lets him relax a little. For now. The last he needs is to get forced into talking like a cutesy advertisement or something. Sure, he keeps backups, but he hasn't needed to use one yet.
He'd let out a breath if he had one, but since he doesn't, he simply tilts his head slightly.]
I'm a more complicated piece of equipment than a cellular device.
( he says it in a way that assumes that it is not right. )
Regardless, you'll report to none other than Roman Sionis and myself. You'll also be expected to take care of the duties here at the shop. Greet customers, answer phone calls, in addition to your work on our campaign. I want Gluskin / Sionis signs on every street corner by morning.
[He yells so loud that there's static in the audio. The order's in his queue as usual, but the modifications he's been working on at least give him a moment of hesitation when it's something he really, really objects to.
He wonders if he might be able to cause some kind of disaster in this stupid little establishment.]
I'm not a retail worker! I have five PhDs! I can't uproot my entire existence so you can play politics!
( yes, much work to do with this one indeed. though, for his cooperation, eddie is glad to stroke a hand over robotnik's head — the way one would when soothing a frightened deer — and smooth his thumbs over the side of his faceplate where his cheeks should be. where they would be, if he weren't a filthy traitor who sold of his humanity for a can of motor oil and a handful of lasers.
eddie tries not to wither at the thought. )
See? You can be a good girl. That was very good of you. Can you do it again?
[Robotnik doesn't completely hate this. Why doesn't he completely hate this?
He can unpack that later, or maybe never.]
I'm sorry.
[He doesn't look sorry, but this is a point where being incapable of facial expressions really work for him, because otherwise he'd really be glaring up a storm.]
[Now, this, he does completely hate. So, the solution? Malicious compliance. He's been given a small amount of orders... with plenty of freedom for his systems to accept. The signs are ugly, any customers or callers are treated rudely, and he teaches swear words to any small children he encounters. And all the while, he's programming as much as he can in his head. He needs to get rid of this stupid compulsion before his entire life becomes servitude to this oaf.]
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no subject
Oh, the jokes we tell. But you shouldn't keep a nasty word like 'despise' in your vocabulary, now, should you, dear? Remove it at once.
( the slogans make him smile, just the right amount of family charm. oh, how robotnik knows him. )
Why not work as you charge, like a cellular device?
no subject
[Oh, thank fuck. That at least lets him relax a little. For now. The last he needs is to get forced into talking like a cutesy advertisement or something. Sure, he keeps backups, but he hasn't needed to use one yet.
He'd let out a breath if he had one, but since he doesn't, he simply tilts his head slightly.]
I'm a more complicated piece of equipment than a cellular device.
no subject
( he says it in a way that assumes that it is not right. )
Regardless, you'll report to none other than Roman Sionis and myself. You'll also be expected to take care of the duties here at the shop. Greet customers, answer phone calls, in addition to your work on our campaign. I want Gluskin / Sionis signs on every street corner by morning.
Are we clear?
no subject
[He yells so loud that there's static in the audio. The order's in his queue as usual, but the modifications he's been working on at least give him a moment of hesitation when it's something he really, really objects to.
He wonders if he might be able to cause some kind of disaster in this stupid little establishment.]
I'm not a retail worker! I have five PhDs! I can't uproot my entire existence so you can play politics!
no subject
Are you quite finished with this tantrum of yours?
no subject
[He's still yelling, for sure.]
Just know, if you keep this up, you'll regret this. Whenever you least expect it...
no subject
( eddie wrinkles his nose but appears otherwise unaffected. )
Lower your decibels by, say... 60%? Is that time of the month, dear? Is that why you're so out of sorts?
no subject
[As he rants, he lowers the volume on his voice, which frustratingly makes it less effective.]
There is no "time of the month!" How stupid are you?
no subject
We'll have none of that.
Apologize.
no subject
[He stops short. Ugh he has so much left to work on to excise this horrible little feature from his systems.]
...I'm sorry.
no subject
eddie tries not to wither at the thought. )
See? You can be a good girl. That was very good of you. Can you do it again?
no subject
He can unpack that later, or maybe never.]
I'm sorry.
[He doesn't look sorry, but this is a point where being incapable of facial expressions really work for him, because otherwise he'd really be glaring up a storm.]
no subject
( he gives his robotic companion a final, dainty little pat before rising to his feet. )
Signage, buttons, stamps for the children. You've a lot to do, don't you?
no subject
[Now, this, he does completely hate. So, the solution? Malicious compliance. He's been given a small amount of orders... with plenty of freedom for his systems to accept. The signs are ugly, any customers or callers are treated rudely, and he teaches swear words to any small children he encounters. And all the while, he's programming as much as he can in his head. He needs to get rid of this stupid compulsion before his entire life becomes servitude to this oaf.]